Take it off! See. Love. Grow.

Becoming Your Own Hero: The Mastermind Behind the Hero’s Journey

• Joshua Fields & Jeremy Rubin • Season 2 • Episode 2

Share episode

Send us a text

Ever wondered what it means to be the hero of your own life? Join us as Michael Multari, the visionary behind the Hero's Journey Retreat, shares his transformative story, starting with his second divorce over a decade ago. Michael discusses how facing his deepest fears and expanding his circle of trust led to profound personal growth, emphasizing the importance of solitude and supportive relationships.

This episode redefines heroism, showing that everyday individuals—parents, teachers, and those overcoming personal challenges—embody heroism in unique ways. We explore Joseph Campbell's framework to highlight how internal obstacles can be overcome to embrace one's role as the protagonist of their story. Michael shares insights from the Hero's Journey Retreat, focusing on how it fosters meaningful change and encourages personal growth.

We also delve into the role of intuition and conscious choices in navigating life's uncertainties, stressing the importance of embracing one's inner child. Michael recounts a client’s story that highlights the joy of reconnecting with our playful selves. This episode is a reflection on personal growth, resilience, and self-discovery, inviting listeners to embark on their own transformative journey. Join us in building a community where everyone can feel seen, heard, and empowered to unlock their true potential.

Michael Multari:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/multari_coaching?igsh=aGNlYnBoZWNkYTc4

Website: https://multaricoaching.com

Find us on our online platforms:

Co-Host: Joshua Fields ACC, CPC, & Master ELI Practitioner

Website: https://joshuafields.coach/   

Instagram: https://instagram.com/joshuaafields?igshid=NDc0ODY0MjQ=

Email List: https://archive.aweber.com/newsletter/awlist6189433 

Co-Host: Jeremy Rubin, Keynote Speaker, Author, Consultant, Sales Leader

Website: http://faceconsultinggroup.com/

Instagram: https://instagram.com/ajeremyrubinstory?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

Speaker 1:

So, when you feel like hope is gone, look inside you and be strong and you'll finally see the truth that a hero lies in you. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Take it Off podcast, where we see love grow. I am your co-host, joshua Fields, and I'm excited for today's episode. Today's episode is about the hero's journey and, you know, here on the Take it Off podcast, we strip away the layers, we dive into deep and real conversations about being authentically human, and today's conversation talks about just that. Meet the mastermind behind the hero's journey with my good buddy, michael Montari, who also served as the co-coach and co-facilitator for the hero's journey retreat. And we just got back from Tehran and Colombia and took four amazing people on an adventure, all embedded with this framework and perspective, around deepening intimacy with self and figuring out what type of hero do you need to be for you. Join me into this riveting, thought-provoking conversation with Michael Motari.

Speaker 1:

Ladies and gentlemen, without further ado, meet the mastermind behind the Hero's Journey Retreat. Join me in this conversation, all right. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Take it Off podcast See love grow. I am here. You heard me in introduction, but I'm here to kick off Season 2, episode 2, with a brother of mine that I met through an interplay project. You guys heard me talk in reference to Julia before, but the coach for me. She held a very intensive interplay workshop around what you hear me talk about before the Energy Leadership Index Assessment and Framework.

Speaker 1:

But I met this brother who was on his own journey. He's also an IPEC graduate as well as a coach, full-time supporting the education industry. I'll let him double-click on some of these things that he'll highlight that tell me more about him. But what I do know about Mr Michael Muttari is he is no nonsense. He's committed to self-development and growth. He cares about what people are thinking, because that mindset ultimately impacts what they do. We have clarity in our mind. It's the kindest thing that we can do on our journey, on our spiritual growth, and he has done many hard things reinventing himself, taking his life and owning it and making it the most of what he wants it to be. This is what attracted to me and his vision. Ladies and gentlemen, without further ado, introducing to some, but presenting to all, mr Michael Muttari Michael, how are you, my brother?

Speaker 2:

Wow, man, that was awesome. I am so excited to be here. I'm excited to share with your audience. Hopefully I can help support, lend guidance through our conversation and I'm just ecstatic to be with you and to be in this space. So thank you for the invitation.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, brother, I appreciate that. So, ladies and gentlemen, you've heard, you've seen social media splash reels and this retreat that Michael was the visionary behind, and you all get a chance to meet the mastermind behind the hero's journey, and I want this conversation to really be a conversation that inspires folks to think about their own journey. Internally, the purpose of the retreat, we have a retreat that we have already began to think through and create for next year, and this brother has done an amazing job, having a vision that was simple to follow and then seeing the fruit of it. So I'm going to question Michael It'll be interview style, you know how we flow, but we're going to explore the vision behind the hero's journey, what it means for people, why is this something people should be a part of? And we'll let the conversation jump from there. So, to explore this vision, michael, what personal experiences inspired you to co-create the Hero's Journey Retreat?

Speaker 2:

That's a great question, brother. And since we're talking about heroes, every hero has an origin story, and and I always prior to 10 years ago where I'm going to start I would never in a million years consider myself a hero Never. That type of language was not in my vocabulary. I would be a hero in another person's story, but not my own.

Speaker 2:

And what happened over 10 years ago was my second divorce, and through that divorce, divorce and through that divorce, I learned that this was an opportunity. I had to turn the page on my past behaviors if I wanted to A not repeat again. And also, how am I going to change? That's going to allow me to become more of my authentic self, and that's really important to me. And so the things that I had to contend with after that divorce was the ideas of playing small. I didn't communicate well as a partner. I didn't communicate well as a partner. I really did not communicate my own needs, my own thoughts. I was brought up to fear my own voice. I was afraid to speak my own truth, and my focus was always the need to please others, and I also had a lot of difficulties in trusting others. I had a very small circle of friends at that time maybe one or two people and I lacked the confidence to really grow and to really get big.

Speaker 2:

And so the hero's journey began over 10 years ago and through therapy journey began over 10 years ago and through therapy. I continued therapy when we divorced and I also decided in that I need to create a success team for myself. I want to surround myself with people who I admire. I want to surround myself with people who are doing it the right way, people who spoke, who said this is who I am, I'm going to lead authentically. And so I started to grow my circle and I started to ask questions. I started to spend more time in solitude not alone, but in solitude where I started asking questions of myself. I started asking what do I want? What do I want from this life that I'm given? I asked what are my values? What's really mine? Why do I have these values? And I asked another really important question of what's getting in my way and those. And that's what I started doing over 10 years ago and in therapy. I'll never forget my therapist at the time, ned. He's like you're on your own hero's journey and I was like what A hero. And I was like what A hero. Like Odysseus, like Batman, like Superman, like what? Like Wonder Woman. No man Like I. That just felt so weird for him to say it. But as time went on, I started to embrace that notion of finding myself, finding authentic self, finding my purpose even more so. I had an amazing job. I loved it, and all of these things were happening at the same time. I got the job that I wanted. I bought that condominium in downtown Santa Fe that I always wanted in downtown Santa Fe that I always wanted. All these things were happening and there was still something missing, and so I kept on digging and digging and digging and finally something did happen where it just shot me out of a cannon.

Speaker 2:

I was on this river trip with our senior class, their last thing in 2018, the class of 2018. I went on this river trip down the Green River in Utah and it's a 90 mile run, bro, and it was epic. I've been on this trip five other times and this was my sixth. The senior classes would invite me to come with them and I would just enjoy the presence. Man, enjoy the river, enjoy going down this beautiful canyon, and I would row. On those previous trips, the guides would ask me to row, or I would ask if I could row, because I really liked the big boat, I really liked being in this physical space, and we got to this one part where the kids kind of get off the boat and they go on this like mile hike and go look at petroglyphs. Well, I already did that like five other times and so I was like I think I'm just going to hang back in and go with you guys, the guides, and take the boats, and they're like no, no, no, no, I've got an idea.

Speaker 2:

This 26-year-old guy I'll never forget his name, his name was Rocky comes to me and he's like Mike, I want you to take the boat yourself and go through that rapid and end up on the other side where we're going to meet. And I was like what he's like? Dude, I've been watching you row this boat for the last three days. You know what you're doing and he goes, you can do this. And so to hear Josh, this 28 year old kid or whatever like kid, telling me that I could do this, I thought to myself why does he have the confidence in me? And I don't? What is that? What is that? So, sure enough, I've been on the river, this particular river, this particular stretch, five other times.

Speaker 2:

I got on those oars, I started and I saw the line in the river you look for the line and I took that line, bro, and I hit it perfectly, perfectly, went through that little rapid, and then you have to pull back because you got to pull out of the rapid and hit the beach on the other side. So I backed the boat up and just started pulling, pulling, and I hit that beach exactly the way I envisioned it in my mind as I was going there. And at that moment I knew I'm done with the life that I've been leading. I'm done. I'm done pleasing others. I'm done playing small. I'm done not communicating my thoughts, not communicating my feelings, I'm done not trusting people.

Speaker 2:

And a week later, when we got back, I went into my boss's office, who's a huge friend. I'm actually working for his coaching company right now. I told him Jim, I'm done being your director of admissions. I'm giving you a year notice and I'm going to sell everything I own and I'm going to start a business. I'm going to start a travel company and I'm going to move down to Columbia, where my mother's family's from. And he's like I want nothing but the best for you, good luck. And that's what I did, bro.

Speaker 2:

I spent a year preparing and on July 1 of 2019, with two suitcases in my hand I left the United States a place that I love, a job that I love, a circle of friends I adore and I came to the unknown, and I've been doing it for over five years now, and fast forward to where I met you.

Speaker 2:

I met you in this group, with Julia and Marisol, and just hearing you talk about your own journey, your own vibe, the things that you've been exploring, the things that you're passionate about, the things that move you, the hero's journey popped into my head, and I'm like I've been on a hero's journey. This dude's been on a hero's journey. I'm like I need to put something together, and so I sat down and I wrote this whole thing up and if you remember that first time we had or maybe it was our second conversation, I said, hey, man, I want to share something with you, and then you, just you lit up. You lit up and I just knew that's it. I got the guy I know. This is the person I'm going to launch this thing with, and not only are we going to launch it, but it is going to be freaking epic and we're going to serve people who are going to be attracted to this, and us. We did it, man, we did it.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, absolutely, man, man, shit, I'm learning some shit I didn't even know and I'm like, I'm fascinated I got my popcorn out listening to you, man. Even with the success of the, of the retreat and doing it right, it's been done. It's not an idea anymore, it is, it is. It is a resume builder, it is a transformational vessel and tool that we've taken people on and we have tangible results to show for it. And one thing you said that I even remember some of our participants on the hero's journey struggle with. When you refer to as a hero, what about? That title brings almost like shrinking reactions like oh no, no, that's not me. Hero, hero, who is that for? We kind of spin and go, and we saw some of our participants do the same thing.

Speaker 1:

I don't know if I connect with the name hero. What about that term? Why should we embrace what it means to be a hero?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, man, that's an awesome question, I think first, the discomfort with that is we're taught that heroes do huge things, like Simone Biles. Right, she's a hero. She struggled with and she was open about her mental health and then all of a sudden became the most decorated. We look at people like a patrick mahomes in the sports world and we say, look at that guy, he's going for three superbowls in a row. We at and we hear about the firemen and the police officers that ran into the world trade center during nine 11. And we saw that.

Speaker 2:

So heroes whether you think about comic books or real life heroes, they do something of significance. But you know what, man? I learned that just being a human and getting through a day that can be fraught with conflict or just challenges, that's being a hero. Man, all the moms, all the dads, you're all heroes. You're raising up our future. The teachers are heroes, people are heroes.

Speaker 2:

Getting from point A to point B and I dedicated myself to truly understanding me. That's my journey. I want to know me. I'm the one who has to live with me for the rest of my life. I know myself better than anyone else, so why not consider my own self a hero in my own story I'm the protagonist and all of a sudden I became more comfortable with it. Another way of phrasing being a hero is being the author of your own story, and so, for me, I've become comfortable in that discomfort, man, because I understand. I didn't want to use that term hero, but you know what? Damn it. We all are heroes because we're living, we're breathing, because we're living, we're breathing and we're trying to get from point A to point.

Speaker 1:

B in the best way we possibly can. Yeah, yeah, what's what stuck out to me about the term hero cause? You're right, it's often decorated with really big events or really big milestones that have, you know, large impact on a large scale of people. And when you think about the hero's journey, there are stages of the journey and, using those stages, we obviously embrace the framework from Joseph Campbell's hero's journey and use it to outline the retreat. And I think about the stages, about, you know, being in your ordinary world. Step two right, the call to the adventure. Right, there's a calling on all of our lives, and I think this even shows up.

Speaker 1:

I grew up in a very religious home, so there was always God has a calling on you, son, right, that was always it. And then the immediate reaction what God has a calling on you, son, right, that was always it. And then the immediate reaction what is it? I don't like that call.

Speaker 1:

So there's the refusal of the call, because oftentimes what we're refusing is I don't want to confront my lack of confidence, my self-judgment, my critique of who I think I am. I'm not that, I'm not a hero, I'm whatever Gotham needs me to be. You need me to be the villain great. You need me to be the hero great. But even in that there's a lack of identity about, well, who are you, and we shrink from thinking about whatever that call is. That is it, that is on our life. Ultimately, it has a lot to do with what you think of yourself and how you will lean into whatever the pain is that will create the heroic being that you are. So I say all that to say, michael, can you share with us in this journey over the past 10 years, what awakened you from a mindset standpoint where you were no longer going to refuse being the hero that you needed yourself to be, where you decided to embrace what it means to be Michael's own hero?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I got tired. I got tired. I got tired of being frustrated, I got tired of holding in anger, I got tired of not voicing what I feel, I got tired and finally, like after a second divorce, I got tired of wait a minute. I have to accept responsibility for me. I have to accept responsibility for me and what is it that I'm doing that's getting in the way of me being my authentic self? And we throw that term being your authentic self self so much we toss it around.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Reality is you have to face that stuff. You have to, and that's why I believe people are the heroes when you start facing the noise inside everyone thinks about. Success is external. If I have more money, if I have that job, that title, if I have all the most beautiful girlfriends or boyfriends, if I, whatever it is everything's external. And we and we live in a society, okay, where we cherish that, the outward.

Speaker 2:

And I realized that, damn man, that wasn't that. I was tired of that. I was tired of it. And then, as soon as I started looking in, I started like, uh-oh, I've got some blind spots here, man. I've got some things that are getting in my way. I've got some gremlins, I've got some assumptions, I've got some limiting beliefs about myself. And I, if I'm going to grow, if I'm going to be a true hero, I got to face that the way you said it. You got to face that stuff, man, and that's hard, that ain't easy, man, and you have to look, have to, and I say you have to. You have to find the time. You have to find the time, Gift yourself time to look inward, because the world's not set up for that. The first step is making that time, because you have to believe that you're the most valuable asset that you have. You.

Speaker 1:

Yeah yeah, valuable asset that you have. You, yeah yeah, you're saying you're hitting on something really powerful about how the world is set up around prioritizing time, carving that out in your schedule and making yourself matter and the discipline that it takes to be able to do that. And in some ways, people prefer not to focus on themselves. It is an inconvenience, it is. I think the question that's coming up for me when I think about that is how does the hero's journey retreat? How does that retreat address someone that does not prioritize themselves to be focused on, to be considered to be prioritized? How does the retreat expose that and compel them to want to leave? And, like you know what I am valuable, I do need to make myself matter. I haven't done it in the past. How does the retreat address that?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I think, first searching for something that inspires you. Right, you were talking about growing up in a religious family and God has a plan, right? Well, so many times you hear people say just send me a sign, I need a sign. And then we ignore them. Right, we ignore them because it might be a little too scary.

Speaker 1:

Refusal of the call.

Speaker 2:

There you go there, you go, there you go. And the hero's journey retreat is set up like this. The way we described it is we built something, you and I. We built something. We know it's not for everybody, and we threw this thing out into the universe right Through social media, through word of mouth. I mean, I can't even count how many conversations I had one-on-one with people and it resonated with the people it needed to resonate with, and maybe those people in the past were refusing the call, but the fact that they jumped on a plane, flew to another continent, another country, went someplace where they didn't know. Everyone who is going to participate to me was the sign that they are already heroes. Just making that leap of fate. It was a leap of fate. The four people that decided to come with us. It was a leap of fate. And that's what I think the hero's journey begins with is that belief in yourself that if I jump, I will fly.

Speaker 1:

That's powerful Because there's so many. When you talk about success, and you know, obviously, you know we use the energy leadership index framework to really add some, some, some boundaries around and framing, you know, our, our mindsets. And so I think about, as you say, that, the power that comes with making the leap, because we're not committed to an outcome, but we're committed to being more of who we are 100%. And you cannot become more of who you are being, more what other people want you to be.

Speaker 1:

Okay, more of who you are being more what other people want you to be. It is difficult to reconcile that, to face that, to make that work and oftentimes our great depending on how we frame what success looks like our greatest VPs and CEOs and all these other high-end positions that we seek out, that we're trying to chase Nothing wrong with the chase, but there's a lot of pain inspiring these people to be where they are and they get to those levels and it's like, well, now, what Am I still good enough? Does this title now mean that you'll listen to me? I told my I have a client right now and I was like you don't need another degree, you don't need another degree, you don't need another certification. You need to take the risk to find out who your people are, and that's relationship and so what I really was really inspired by what you said earlier around. I needed to find my people. I needed to get situated in an environment that was nourishing, that was going to water me, that was going to ultimately grow me and that does not look like how do I do more of what other people want me to do? So I then, in turn, manipulate their love for me or their compassion for me.

Speaker 1:

I think what the hero journey really does is center the person. No one is coming to save you. There is not a hero that's coming to Columbia to save you. So when you talk about the journey to get on that plane, go to a different country, go to a different continent, find yourself in a jungle you are literally coming to save yourself, but you need to be removed from the distractions that don't allow you to see that purely. And so, anyway, these are simple things. You mentioned it. Simple but not easy to do, especially when you're constantly indebted to other people that want something from you because we lack the boundaries around saying no, because we don't want to be rejected or have people think something else of us. We get in our own way. So my next question for you, michael, is the person that you're looking for to resonate with the Hero's Journey retreat. What are they doing? What are they struggling with? What tension are they encountering in their life that deserves the gift of time to prioritize themselves, like the hero's journey with she yeah, I.

Speaker 2:

I think that person is someone who has been in the repetition loop. That person he's like why am I frustrated for the umpteenth million time with this person when I'm not communicating what I'm feeling? Or why is it that I'm not getting what I want, when I'm not voicing truly what I want? I think the person who's looking to break that cycle, that person who's looking for taking a giant leap Because all of this and there's something we haven't discussed is intuition. We have this innate gift inside of us called intuition that guides us. It's the thing that tells us it's time to sell everything you own, it's time to leave this job, it's time to leave this marriage, it's time, it's time, whatever it might be, go. The other part of intuition is this is pain, and you used that term, I think, twice or three times since we started speaking today.

Speaker 2:

I firmly believe that we're always going to have pain in our life. Pain is present always, just like happiness and joy are present. Pain is present. The problem with pain is most of us aren't choosing the pain that we receive. So let me give you an example. I was in pain even though I was in a job that I loved, okay, in a community that I love. The pain that I was receiving was something's missing. Something's missing. I was on the verge of turning 50. And I'm like, why do I still feel that something's missing? I've got everything I want.

Speaker 1:

And you guys, you got to see this guy. He doesn't look 50. I know he's talking about this transformation 10 years ago, but'm honestly, one of the very things that attracted me to your work and you is how you have preserved you, I love. I just want to say, because that's important, it, that is so important we don't want to just skip past that. It is a show of discipline and a commitment to yourself that you have decided to carve out time to maintain the gift of your body and your mind. So that did not like escape me. It's a part of the journey. Right Is to help you be the best looking you as well as having the best mind. Right, it shows up. It shows up. So that I just wanted to say that you guys I know this, you're listening, but if you can go to Michael, I'll put his, I'll put his information in social media. Go, look at my guy. My guy is doing things that inspire me at 42 years old. I'm looking forward to the next 10 years because of this man. Go ahead, my brother.

Speaker 2:

I love you, man, I love you, and that is. That's another example of choosing your pain. But back to being in a place where I loved and all of that, and I was still feeling pain. I'm like, wait a minute, I can't feel this type of pain for the rest of my life. I just can't. So what's the opposite of that? Well, if I do something about that pain, there's going to be an unknown pain, right? So if I go from the pain that I don't want, I already know that there's going to be another pain. So you know what? I'm going to embrace it. And that's the scary part. Because we stick with the same things, because we know that pain, we stay in those marriages, we stay in those jobs, we stay in those relationships, because we know the pain. The hero says F it. I'm going to choose another pain. And what I realized as soon as I chose-.

Speaker 2:

Consciously consciously chose another pain.

Speaker 1:

Yes.

Speaker 2:

As soon as I did it, even though there's pain moving to a new country I didn't know how to speak the language fully, I didn't know that the culture was going to be so huge. But the fact that I chose that pain, I embraced it. I said bring it, because this is filling that hole that I had. And I was like damn. I had to take another leap and embrace the pain that I chose, and when you choose your own pain, it doesn't hurt as much. You're still gonna feel it, yeah, but it doesn't hurt yeah that's like going to the gym

Speaker 2:

you're giving me all these little compliments. I go to the gym because you know what, if I make it to 70, 80, 9, I want to enjoy life still, man. I want to the gym because you know what, if I make it to 70, 80, 90, I want to enjoy life. Still, man, I want to enjoy life. So I've been working on this body my whole life. It's also part of the way I gift myself. Time for thought and time for reflection is in the gym. That's another beautiful part of being in the gym, yeah, so yeah choose the pain, man, or your pain is going to choose you.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, the hero the hero chooses their own pain. Let's go down there for a minute. Yeah, I want to think about how do we strategize? All right, right, so we got. Ideally, we want people that are down to consciously choose their pain move from default experiences into designing the experiences they want. So we're waking up this consciousness.

Speaker 1:

So, with this awakened consciousness, what is the process that we used to structure deep introspection and really facilitating transformation for people? What went into the facilitating of transformation for people to access that depth that's within them? Because the last thing I'll say before I let you answer is no one's coming to change you, no one's coming to fix you. There is nothing wrong with you. You have access to everything you need, right? But it's a matter of how do we remove those mental blocks that allow us to see more of who we are, versus the short-sighted thinking about who we are not, and so we just want people to know, as you show up, as you are coming, we're not coming to say we got the, we got something for you that's gonna transform you, right, you're gonna transform yourself. But, michael, touch on what went into preparing people to access that, that information that is deep for them to be able to transform their own thinking?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and I'm going to piggyback on some of the things you just said.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

The first thing is and we already discussed it they chose to come to the hero's journey. So when you choose to do something that might be uncomfortable, that you know is going to be uncomfortable, you're already choosing your pain and you come with a confidence. You come whether you're conscious about it or not. You're already confident because I just bought my ticket. I'm going to do the hero's journey. So the people who land physically, land in another world. They're already feeling a level of confidence because they chose it. And so what do you and I do? I envision it like this we set the table.

Speaker 2:

We set this beautiful table out for our guests. We said we've got these lessons. We're going to talk about energy leadership. We're going to look at and dissect how you show up. We're also going to do some physical stuff. We went on a 12 mile hike. We went through some jungle, Absolutely. We saw some animals that we've never seen before. Yeah, we ended up at the Caribbean, swimming in waters that you can only dream of opportunities for reflection, opportunities for recovery, massages, quiet space. So we set the table and we, to your point, we're not there to save them. They sat at the table and they wanted something that we could provide. And so that's the beauty of the Heroes Journey Retreat is, if you come, you already did the hardest thing. You already did the hardest thing, you took the leap knowing that you could fly. And what we do is we just provide a beautiful table with excellent food, with excellent conversation, and we allow each individual to dig deeper into becoming the hero of their own story. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

What would you add to that?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I would. I mean, you're spot on. The commitment to your own growth mindset is prime and a necessary ingredient in your own journey you have if you, depending on what you think of you, are not committed to saving yourself for yourself so you can better serve the people that you love, the people that depend on you. It is to your benefit to carve out the space and time for transformation and to be nourished right where you are. There's a saying out there bloom where you are planted. But the blooming part is a choice. You will be planted somewhere, for sure, like you're a human being, so you will be planted somewhere. You will settle somewhere, not in a negative sense, but you will settle somewhere. What is your environment that you're settling in? How does it help you bloom and grow? And that's on you, that's your responsibility.

Speaker 1:

There are people in many places. That's why suicide and health problems and mental issues. It does not discriminate all social classes. We've had people on our retreat that are attached to some high social experiences and wealth and guess what? They found themselves on their own journey trying to figure out life. To figure out life, we got people that are divorced kids, single parent homes, head of this, head of that big money, no money, and guess what. They're still on their journey, trying to figure out who they are, and so a commitment to that is a agreement ingredient in figuring out who you are, because you have access to transformation. You are exactly who you need to be to transform.

Speaker 1:

The question is, who are you going to recruit that will hold space on your journey, to hold you accountable to the things that you need to do for yourself?

Speaker 1:

And so so we leave our hero's journey with a network follow-up conversations where I mean we pressure test Don't bring anything to our last session where you're just like, yeah, I'm going to do this and I'm going to do that. How are you going to do that? What is the timeline? Let's make this something that can be a lifestyle for you, and we want you to own what you're, what you're believing you need, and just fall in love with the process of being processed. You know that that's, that's really what it is. There is nowhere to go but back to you. And so, as I move this conversation forward, and we're gonna're going to close with a couple things, I want you to highlight for us, michael, what was a standout moment for you, a lesson that you learned from doing your first retreat in the same calendar year, working on this for 10 years. But when you were ready to go, the universe put the go folks around you and we went and now we're and now we've completed it.

Speaker 1:

But in that process, right, what did you learn? What leveled you up?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, man, that's an. I love that. And I'm going to go and give a snapshot of something that I saw that just melted me and I'm going. I believe that all of us adults, every single one, I don't care if you're 30 years old or 80 years old, I don't care, we're all still kids inside We've got that kid still living in them. Yeah, absolutely. And so much of life tells us not to pay attention to that child within. It tells us you got to be the adult. I've got a mortgage, I've got a job, I've got a wife, I got kids. Ah, don't listen to the kid inside. And one of our clients came and I happened to spend time with this client a couple of days before doing a little travel before the. We got to Santa Marta and, very reserved, and you're talking about.

Speaker 1:

You were with a client before the hero's journey officially started.

Speaker 2:

Yes, okay, two days before, thank you, and very reserved, very watched what they said, very cognizant, very professional's great, that's great. I love that. That's important. And I also know there's a, there's a kid inside that adult body and I'm like I wonder if I'm gonna see the child. Damn man, we were on the last day when you and I and we took the group up to the cacao farm and we came back and remember we had to walk through the river to get there.

Speaker 2:

And then we were walking through the river on the way back and we were going to do a video shoot and this particular client of ours, this trailblazer of ours, decided I'm going to play in the river.

Speaker 2:

And they got into the river and laid down. The river wasn't that deep, so there was a spot where you can lay down on your stomach and put their elbows in the water and their chin in their hands and kick in their feet and splash and I was like that's the child and man. I got like the hair in the back of my neck stood up because I wonder how many times in the last decades have they embraced that child within. And after that I just felt like this looseness for the rest of the day around this person. Where there was more laughter, there was more like hey, man, this is what I'm thinking. You know, there was this more play and I was in awe and I always search every day for two things awe and joy. And I experienced both of those in that one moment when you and I were in the river with our group.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, I know exactly who you're talking about. And to just paint a high level picture without getting folks too much of a folks business. Are you a high level executive that has to perform and put on to keep others at a certain distance? Do you love to control your environment? Because you do not trust people, you have to see it through. Who else is going to do it? If not me, then who?

Speaker 1:

And you've been promoted because you have this fascination with systems and operations and thinking through things other people aren't thinking through, and so you get another title. They promote you, they put you in positions of power and all along there's this constant indebted feeling around. Am I good enough? Am I doing it better than what I could, or is there a way to do it even better? Right, and sometimes that can get in our way. I'm not saying disregard it, but you hit on it. When is the last time you embraced your child? I recently took a client through an exercise around fun and enjoyment. Let's rate your fun and enjoyment and we broke it down in nine different categories.

Speaker 1:

If you're interested, book a session with me or Michael and you can learn more about who you are in fun and play.

Speaker 2:

Absolutely.

Speaker 1:

But what we came away with? Big position needs to control things. Don't trust people. I have to look several times. I have to inspect what I expect. Get it.

Speaker 1:

It is a skill and there's also a tool that is underutilized for people that allows them to be sharper and more creative and innovative is being able to play, being able to play with the child within you to allow them to have that curiosity, the spontaneity, the risk taking, the growth mindset that comes with wanting to grow. The child comes here ready to grow. Yes, it is embedded in our curiosity, like, oh, if I stand here, that's why children have so many questions. But what does that do? How does that connect to that? Hey dad, is this real? What is that?

Speaker 1:

I'm like you can even get frustrated to a certain degree, yeah, but I'd rather my children be frustrated with learning, or I'd rather be frustrated with all their questions around learning, than to just sit and be a victim and not want to grow Like kick your pain. People Fall in love with being a bit playful, a bit buoyant, right, these are tools and parts of you that get ignored when we constantly have to perform for other people and it is not fulfilling us. I know the person you're talking about goes back, regardless if it's implemented to the 10th degree or not. They know that they have access to an experience where they were capable of playing and still not losing any ground on who they are. Actually. This amplified who they were. So beautiful example, brother.

Speaker 2:

No, I love that and you hit on really important things. First of all, embracing the child within is exactly what you said being curious, asking questions, doing something, especially outdoors that's just playful.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

We're not talking about being in the chore and being a goof no, that's that's not it. Being immature and being a goofball no, that's that's not it. Embracing the child in is seeing life through kids lens, because there's such a joy. And I want to know this. I want to know that and I think you're right. Our titles are dollars in our pocket, way we're taught. You're an adult now you have to start at why.

Speaker 2:

Why and I think, when you're your authentic self, you can still be respected, and I think that's the other side of this. Just because you come through some certain things with the child vision or lens doesn't mean that people will disrespect you. It means that you're like hey, man, there's joy, there's awe in this world, and I want to embrace those moments. Yeah, because that's what we're here for, man.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, that's what we're here for so well said.

Speaker 1:

Thank you for sharing that yeah, no, I mean obviously, bro, we flow right. So we just iron sharpens iron. Oh, you're gonna constantly say something that's gonna trigger, in the most anabolic ways, deeper perspectives and and we, we definitely do that, we, we, we love a bit of a scuba dive. We, you know, we'llkel, that's right, we will snorkel if that's what you want to do, yep, but we're going to get a little deeper to access this information that remains not as conscious for our people, because there's a certain level of safety hanging out on the surface.

Speaker 2:

But that's it. That's part of the hero's journey retreat is I want to support people in becoming more conscious. I want to support people where they are, and you said it about this particular client. I don't know if they're going to go back and embrace the whole child mentality, but you said something so significant. They know now how to access it and they're more conscious about that. And heck, that's what it's about. It's about taking steps forward and being more conscious, being more conscious of why I do the things I do. Why don't I have these values? Why do I act like this? What happens if I do something differently? And I think that's just it you.

Speaker 2:

I think what I love about working with you is hey, we're going to meet people where they are, not where we think they should be, Because that goes to I'm not here to save anyone, Just like you said, I want you. The fact that you showed up to me. That's success. Yeah, it's already success. Yeah, Now we've got five days together. What else are you going to peel back? What steps are you going to take on that hero's journey? What other trials are you going to put yourself through? That will bring out something different, something powerful. That's why I love what we did a couple of weeks ago.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, powerful, brother Powerful. So, looking forward, you got a big feet underneath your belt, and if you were to just give us a peek? I know we've talked about this, but from your vantage point, what do you envision the future of the hero's journey being or becoming? What's in store for the next group?

Speaker 2:

I love it. Remember we met a very special person in the woods, in the jungle.

Speaker 1:

Yes, we did.

Speaker 2:

And very powerful. Wise individual told us and I didn't have this vocabulary prior- and you're talking about.

Speaker 1:

We met this person on the hero's journey in the jungle. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

Yes.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

When I heard them say these words. I didn't create this place for you, I created this for me, and the people who are going to be attracted to that are going to show up and I will welcome every single one of them home and welcome them. And that's true, that's. I created this hero's journey for me. I created it for me. I've been on it. Now I want to create it and say like wow, others, whoever the others are, you were the first one. You're like yes, I want to be a part of this. Of course, Welcome home, brother. You and I are brothers.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And that's my vision is like to bring people and put the bat signal out there, if you will, and whoever sees it, and it speaks to them.

Speaker 2:

They have a home, they have a place where they're safe, they have a place where they can feel seen and heard and appreciated for just being them, and I can see you and I doing this once a year, twice a year, for whoever Like maybe it might be a whole executive team might want to come to this, and we just cater to that. Maybe it's be a hodgepodge of people from all walks of life that meet up in the jungle of colombia, and that's what we do, but it's there. The hero's journey retreat is there for the people who it speaks to, and when they come, they've joined a community that we you and I created, and it's it's a gift. Not only do we receive the gift of their presence and learnings, but they also receive a gift that they gave themselves the space, the time out, the disconnection to connect while they're in Tyrona, and that's I look forward to the next one in 2025. We've already got it set up and we'll launch it.

Speaker 2:

I know we'll launch it very soon and, yeah, whoever those next people are, I can't wait. Where are they?

Speaker 1:

Waiting, absolutely, absolutely. In summary, I think, right, this journey around self-discovery, being committed to being your best self, which looks like reaching out for therapy. You mentioned that Finding a coach, finding someone to hold space for you so you can be free to let go of judging yourself, assuming things about who you are because of a family lineage or a history around trauma that you've embraced, suits you, that hold you back, that ultimately lead to these very, very limiting beliefs that you have on your mind. Right? What we're talking about in the Hero's Journey is I mean, it is embedded in the title of the podcast we're going to take some things off. We're going to see ourself without judgment. We're going to look at ourself and even the parts that are difficult to love. We're going to find a way to love those things and ultimately grow as a result, right? So embracing discomfort allows us to grow personally, and so, when I think about the hero's journey, about prioritizing oneself and making time for introspection as well as your own personal development, so having this idea turn into a lived experience for our business, our coaching business, being able to coach in a foreign country and invite people into our home, because wherever our home is is where our heart and our mind are, so we could be in Colombia.

Speaker 1:

We could be in Iceland. Our home is is where our heart and our mind are, so we could be in columbia. We could be in iceland. We can be in dubai. We can be in santa fe. We can be in seattle and create these moments for people to access depth that is already in them, but the fear, self-judgment, blocks it right, and so everyone is on their own journey is what I learned today. You are on your own hero's journey, and your journey is not just yours alone, but choose your journey so the people that need you to choose them you encounter on your journey. You're not augmenting yourself or stretching yourself to the point where you don't even recognize whose journey you're on. I saw something on, I forget. I think it was Carl Jung. I'm going to butcher that, but if the journey is clear for you, if the path is already clear, you probably are on somebody else's journey.

Speaker 1:

Your journey should look very obstacle, ridden full of challenges and obstacles and adventures and things that. How am I going to make sense of this? That's when you know you're in a growth mindset and you're accepting the call for pain that you consciously choose because it's going to create more of the beautiful person you are. So, brother, thank you so much for giving us the mindset, the backstory behind what inspired you. Many people can connect with being in relationships that are not serving them and they stay anyway, and you did something about it because you are ultimately your primary relationship. So, thank you, brother, I appreciate you. How can people find you, michael? Where, where, where, where are you at?

Speaker 2:

How can people get to you. Okay, so on Instagram, multari coaching and then, and website, multari coachingcom, linkedin, michael Multari. Yeah, I'm just okay, I'm out there. I'm out there, he's out there.

Speaker 1:

I'm out there.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, he's outside. Take a visit and drop me a note. I'd love to hear from y'all and I hope that someone got something out of this today. Just remember this one thing If you believe that you can jump off this cliff and fly, you will fly. I promise you. You believe it. Make the leap, have faith in yourself and you will fly as far that you can possibly go. Appreciate you, brother, Always having these one-on-ones and these conversations with you. You move me and our listeners are lucky to have you.

Speaker 1:

Thank you, brother, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you To our listeners, are lucky to have you. Thank you, brother, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you To our listeners, those that have been on the journey with us. Really, this podcast and, as you know, with my brother, jeremy Rubin, it was started with the spirit of and we're doing this for us. I want to just allow people a front row seat to the conversations we have all the time. Allow people a front row seat to the conversations we have all the time. Maybe there's something here for you that you can use to inspire.

Speaker 1:

We don't need millions, we just need one person that's going to take what is being said and move them into a space that they may have feared before or have stepped back from because they just did not have the consciousness to be equipped to move in to the pain anyway. And so thank you so much for joining me and allowing Michael to hold space in your cars, in your earlobes or your eardrums and all the things that come with changing a mindset. And so here is to more episodes, more listeners, more people committed to their own journey. Save yourself, so you can be in the most optimal position to help and save others that are committed to their own rescue and recovery. Be well my people. Take it all.

People on this episode

Head Shot

Jeremy Rubin

Co-host
Head Shot

Joshua Fields

Co-host